Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Dear Brittany,

It's almost been a month since you left us and I'm finally coming to terms with it. With all the recent holidays I haven't had to be at work so I've been more easily distracted. Planning my move to Melbourne has definitely helped too.

I hadn't had a chance to tell you about that, I would have seen you at N&M's wedding when I'm back in a few weeks and told you that you could come down and visit me any time you wanted. I'd have enjoyed seeing you.

Instead, I told everyone when we went to M&D's after your funeral. I sat there feeling lonely, wishing you come and sit on my lap and play with my hair like you always did. Though I suppose at 17 you were getting a bit old for that. Didn't stop you last time I saw you though :-P I have a photo of us from that night which I will always treasure. It will have pride of place in my new house in Melbourne so you will get to come with me :-)

I hope you know how much I loved you Britt, I always meant to see you more, especially after Karen died. I thought I should try to be more of a sister to you and not just a cousin, I'll always regret that. At least your friends have plastered your Facebook wall with memories of you and how much they miss you so I'm sure you were never lonely.

I have so much more I wish I could say to you but I know there's no real point. We still haven't heard much but I'm hoping you didn't suffer. They took almost a week before they gave you back to Greg deciding if you were still alive when the man left the scene, I guess it makes a difference to what he'll be charged with. I don't really care anymore cause I know it won't bring you back. And I hope you never saw it coming. Alex is starting to remember and he might have seen headlights, but I'm hoping you were looking at him and laughing and then just like that, you were gone.

I can't write anything else baby girl, I tried to be formal in the hope I'd keep the tears at bay but it's no use.

I miss you.

I love you.

I always will.

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